I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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