woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
