we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
As shirtless as possible
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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