what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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