you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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