i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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