So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
