This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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