I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize