Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
