Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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