i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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