that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
