Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
