Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
barbara walters just said penis...
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
