god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I'm at about main and main street
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
