Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
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It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
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drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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