So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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