that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity