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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it

  (1-617): View more from Massachusetts

  only you. it could only happen to you.

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  we need to stop having unprotected sex.

  (1-319): View more from Iowa

  ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.

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• (516): View more from New York

  I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.

  (1-780): View more from Alberta, CA

  This is why we're friends.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....

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• (818): View more from California

  I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.

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• (434): View more from Virginia

  This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (574): View more from Indiana

  well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.

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• (+22): View more from

  Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.

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• (347): View more from New York

  You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"

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