dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
