do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Randomize
