ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize