I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
two words...techno handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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