I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Randomize
