Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
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