dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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