she looked like the before picture.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
