Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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