dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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