She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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