soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Just pee around me
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
