Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
