My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
