Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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