This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
