im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
