Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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