I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
You may now shotgun with the bride
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
