just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Randomize