Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
