Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
