So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
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I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
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I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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