He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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