She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
