Umm I'm too high to move.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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