doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
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