You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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