Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
