just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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