Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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